100% woah woah woah!!

we absolutely LOVE dr. stewart...it's always SO fun when we see him at our appointments. today was no different...first on the agenda was a routine beta strep test. i find out the results next week. it's no big deal...if you have it they just give you an antibiotic while in labor. nurse candance said you can have it for one pregnancy and not for the next.

then dr. stewart checked my cervix...as he was checking he said, "what did i say it was the last time? - wow...it's 100% thinned!" so then it was a series of questions and answers. basically he said it's a good thing...this means my true labor could go fairly quickly. this means i could be at home and by the time i come in to the hospital i could be 4-5cm dilated and if i was planning on an epidural {YES PLEASE} i should get it done as soon as i get there. scott asked, "but it's not like it will happen so fast that she'd have the baby at home, right??" dr. stewart had a smile and told us that he couldn't rule that possibility out...hahaa THANK GOODNESS we live down the street from the hospital. and again, dr. stewart was so amazing and caring making sure we had his home number in the case we do go into labor. i feel like a ticking baby bomb...stay tuned.

here is some information i found out about my cervix being 100% thinned:
{Effacement is generally measured in percentages by doctors and midwives. When you have an exam your provider will tell you that it is anywhere from 0% to 100% which means not effaced at all to completely effaced and thin. When it is completely effaced it becomes a part of the uterine wall, allowing the baby to pass through.} so now scott and i just sit and wait. need to listen to my body and contractions...unless of course my water breaks.

*dr. stewart ~ we are so incredibly BLESSED to have you as our doctor!! thank you!!*

counting down the days...

our appointment with dr. pandipati went super! i was a little scared going in with my gd numbers...they have been all over the place even though my diet has consisted of mainly home cooked meals {again thank you everyone that has brought over a yummy hot meal!!} and i was afraid he would make me take insulin shots. however, he explained that with the progression of the pregnancy {we're one day shy of 35 weeks...wooohoo!!} my body is constantly changing and to keep in mind the margin of error the machine could have. SO, instead of feeling like i failed...i felt fantastic coming out of our appointment. dr. pandipati said i've been doing great and we scheduled another ultrasound appointment for next friday {december 17, 2010}. now, please know that i pretty much have the month of december memorized in my heart BECAUSE on the 16th {next thursday} baby will have reached week 36 and i will be COMPLETELY off of bed rest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! during the appointment i kindly reminded that that was said to me several weeks ago. a pregnant woman that has been on bed rest for the past 7 weeks doesn't forget something like that!! - and boy do i have plans! on the evening i get off bed rest i plan to go to scott's work's holiday party. on the 18th i plan to go to the carter's holiday party and socialize my little heart out with some good friends...then i'd like to do some holiday shopping.
so, another letter to my sweet little boy:

dear sweetheart...
these days...my heart is SO anxious and i am so ready to meet you!! i have a little tickle in my heart that says you might just come this weekend {ali from your daddy's work also thinks so too!!} but my dream also said the week of Christmas...and what an amazing gift you'd be to us!! however, if you decide to come in january...that'd be great too. you'd give me a chance to get everything ready and have some freedom away from the couch. whatever you decide, we are EXCITED beyond words. love you...

ps...last night when we went to labor and delivery, your daddy was SOOOO excited that it might be the day we meet you. me - i was shakin' like bacon.

whew. wasn't ready anyway...

{12. 7. 2010}

i was pretty darn sure my water didn't break but i did have some leaking of fluids. i know at this point in the pregnancy it's normal to leak some urine {eeew, i know} but because of the pre-term concern the advice nurse had me go into labor and delivery at st. vincent's. i REALLY didn't want to go in but we did.
we packed the car as if this were the real deal and checked in on the 3rd floor from the purple elevators. the lady showed us the doors in which to go through and wished us luck...i was not ready for this. at least not tonight...
they had me put on a hospital gown and hooked me up to the monitor...one to follow baby and one for contractions. baby was doing beautifully...i had two contractions and lot's of irritable ones. the nurse was SO incredibly nice...after being there for almost an hour i was sent home after being checked - it was fluid...not my water breaking {and thankfully not urine!!}.
now i'm back at home on the mattress watching the blazer game...enjoying my "normal" tuesday evening once again with scott and charlie. wonder if i'll be here next week...

we've got a stinker on our hands!!

{thursday, december 2, 2010 ~ 34 weeks}

he passed! he passed! the non-stress test of course...we went in for round two this morning and got hooked up to the monitor. our nurse, deb, was shocked at how low he was sitting...she said he's positioned more like a 36-37 week term baby...yikes! but we started to hear his sweet little heartbeat and halfway through the little bugger turned his back to the doppler and the nurse so we couldn't hear his heartbeat. then, we established the base of his heart rate which was right around 140...the acceleration number they wanted to see would have to be at 155 for at least thirty seconds. this stinker would get up to 152-153 and then stop - he sure was messing with us and making that nurse work!!

baby gave the nurse, scott and i a good laugh this morning...luckily, right towards the end of our 20 minutes he accelerated and the nurse came back in saying he had passed - BARELY.

way to go little stinker!! i love your little mischievous personality...

3...2...1 - THURSDAY!!

each day is a day that our baby boy is growing and we are THANKFUL! this upcoming thursday {december 2, 2010} is a big day because he will be 34 weeks!! dr's told us that at this point in the pregnancy, they will not stop labor. this is because all is developed and long term effects are not typically a problem at this point. he would still be put in nicu because he wouldn't have accumulated enough fat on his little body and because of other reasons but developmentally we will have reached a big milestone. so we're rooting for this thursday...!!

i am having more contractions and other things that indicate a possible early delivery...i've been trying with all my heart to have my prayers be more like: God, help me not to pray for our baby to stay in longer...but more that i will trust in His timing and know in my heart that He already has our son's birthday set in His birthday book.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<...UPDATE...>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

{wednesday, december 1, 2010}

had an appointment with the perinatal side for a fetal non-stress test. baby did not show enough heart acceleration in the 20 minutes i was hooked up to the monitor so they scheduled an unexpected ultrasound. baby still chose not to move even with all the belly shakes and buzzing they did...he did however showed off his hiccuping skills! anyways, i guess they rate the baby on a scale of 1-10. he received a 6. dr. said he ALMOST passed but i think they monitor mom's that have gd very closely so i have to go again tomorrow morning to repeat the same tests. IF baby doesn't pass then i go to labor and delivery which is in the hospital at st. vincent's {purple elevators for family and friends that will come visit after he's here!!} to be further monitored.

now that i've been home and had several swigs of my diet coke the little guy has decided to do a kick party in my belly - NICE. scott and i laughed and he told me i should blog about this...my hopes in partly keeping this blog is that our son will read this when he's a grown man, maybe before he's about to have his own and get a good chuckle out of what a little rascal he was!

we love you son...no matter how much you worry us - now & later!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

give thanks

we had a big ultrasound appointment yesterday {november 23, 2010} with dr. pandipati. we learned that our baby's kidney's were at normal fluid levels {praise God!} and that he has grown since our last appointment and is now 4 pounds 5 ounces...yayy baby!! we have been praying for his kidney's to be at normal levels and we are so thankful for this answered prayer. dr. pandipati said i was doing a good job but that i needed continued bed rest. the next goal is to get to 33 weeks {which is tomorrow...thanksgiving day!!} and a bigger goal is to get to 34 weeks {december 2, 2010}.

i am now on the mildest dose of medication for my gestational diabetes to prevent any long term effects it could have on our sweet baby. my numbers first thing in the morning, and after breakfast and lunch have been great...after dinner numbers have been slightly higher which they'd like to see come down a little bit. if this doesn't get addressed now, the long term affects basically would effect long term metabolic issues with our boy. i dislike taking all the medication but if it helps in any way with the development and growth of our baby...i'll do it.

scott and i have started to pack our hospital bag. i doubt we'll have everything ready but at least we'll have the necessities. i think the biggest thing we are thinking and praying about is the possibility of giving birth to our baby boy but not being able to bring him home right away. my sweet friend sarah had her jackson at 26 weeks and told me that the day she was discharged from the hospital and wasn't able to take her boy home for 3 months was one of THE toughest days of her life. i'm trying to wrap my mind around this possibility...you have this idea-dream of being pregnant. you carry this little life inside of you and go through the process of intense labor and you see new mom's all around you leaving the hospital with the precious little one while you leave empty handed - devastating. i know that this is a good possibility but i hope that i turn to my Jesus who has held me so close during this time if this happens to us.

during the past insanely cold days i have enjoyed my appointments {leaving the house is amazing!!} and seeing the snow...i'm hoping for lot's of snow this year and the chance to be a part of it! i'd love to tell our baby that it had snowed so much the year he was born...what wild stories we would have!!

for thanksgiving day, we are spending it with my family...i got the ok from dr. stewart to make the drive over and lay on the couch. it's been several weeks since i've seen my dad so i'm excited to spend some time over there...i'm hoping the little guy is active for grandma, grandpa and uncle bobby to see and feel him move. i am excited for good friends to come and visit...i love this time of year that brings family and friends together to celebrate life and the things we are most thankful for. i know that i have much to give thanks for this year.

{via: etsy}

pregnancy update

here's an update of my appointments from the past 2 weeks:

i failed the 4-hour glucose test. after getting blood drawn SIX times, i failed it miserably. i later learned that i had my ethnicity and genetics going against me {my grandmother had diabetes}. so i got educated on gestational diabetes and now i draw blood four times a day and am on a pretty strict timed diet and the only thing i need to watch are my carb intakes. the roughest day by far was the day of my baby shower...other than that its been good. what this means is i test my blood sugar levels first thing in the morning. then i eat breakfast and wait two hours to recheck. then i have a snack and this is the pattern for the rest of the day. i HAVE to eat three meals with two snacks in between. i also have to have a bedtime snack which usually entails a 1/2 cup of tillamook's peanut butter chocolate ice cream...

i met with dr. stewart last monday {11/8/2010} and he said my cervix had thinned a bit more. he felt around my belly to find baby's position. then he asked me, "at the ultrasound, did they say where he was positioned?" told him that baby was ready and in the right position to pop out!! so, he sent me on my way with continued bed rest and asked when i saw him next. i said not until the day before thanksgiving...he said, "why don't you come see me next monday...it can be your outing for the week!" THANK YOU DR. STEWART FOR KEEPING MY SANITY!!

so i had my most recent check up yesterday {11/15/2010} and i feel that i'm a "regular" at the doctor's office now since i go every week. candace checked me in and had me do the usual: pee in a cup and a weigh in. MIRACULOUSLY i am still under the 25 pound range in which mom's to be expect to gain...woooohooo!! then she mentioned something about getting close to 34 weeks...i was a bit confused but she continued on to say that her and dr. stewart had been talking earlier that day about how he thinks we might have this little guy at week 34. friends, do you realize that that is just TWO AND HALF WEEKS AWAY??!? of course no one truly knows but by golly...we are not ready!! my cervix had not thinned {which is good news} but is softer and i am still 1 cm dilated. he told me that after 32 weeks A LOT of problems in which things can occur in a baby that comes that early are not concerns typically after that...and we get to that huge milestone this coming thursday. if we reach 35 weeks they will lessen my bed rest to level 2 and then by week 36 {which is the week before Christmas} they will completely take me off ~ WOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!!

i pray that this little guy who is SO incredibly active these days, continues to think that being in my belly is warm and comfy for at least the next 2 1/2 weeks. i've been having more mild contractions and lot's of braxton hicks contractions. i feel him hiccuping and at times it feels like he is tickling me with his toes and fingers. he occasionally will kick me hard as if he is making the winning goal in his soccer game and it is those moments that reassure me that he is happy and content.

baby boy you are so loved already but i CAN wait to meet you...xoxo's to you my sweet little boy...

i've had better days...

where do i begin...so much information was given to us today that my head is still trying to process it all...

well, the best part of today was the ultrasound. our little boy is STILL a boy . his little feet are measuring in at 6 cm, we saw that he has hair (thank you JESUS!) and he is weighing in at a whole 3 pounds!! this puts him in the 46% percentile which is good! he is positioned head down...perfect for labor the nurse said...but don't come just yet little guy!

now for the facts of where i'm at with this pregnancy:
~ during the ultrasound they noticed a millimeter over of fluid in his kidney's. dr. pandipati says it is not severe at this point but will re-check this at my next ultrasound. if the fluid level continues to increase, this could mean potential issues in baby's kidney/bladder.
~ at this point, my cervix has thinned since last thursday...it has now thinned 70%. it was previously at 50%. thinning typically leads to the cervix dilating which of course signals labor. at this point, it's too early for that...
~ i am having mild contractions but they are sporadic...i need to watch for the consistency and intensity.
~ there are 4 levels of bed rest. i am on level 3...i DO NOT want to get to level 4 since that would mean i would be on hospital bed rest. i am on full bed rest until our baby comes unless something changes.
~ dr. pandipati IS concerned about pre-term labor. i will be monitored closely by him and dr. stewart. my next appointment with dr. stewart is november 8th and november 23rd with dr. pandipati.

i keep hearing..."let's try and make it to 34 weeks." basically they say they will NOT stop labor if it begins after week 34...the drugs to help develop baby is not effective after this point. did i ever mention i had a dream that i went in to labor the week of Christmas? this would put me at week 37....hmm...i wonder if these are visions and not dreams...?

for myself - i've been an emotional mess. i'll feel fine one minute and then saddened the next - by the thought of not being able to bring our baby home right away...or holding him after he's born. i can't help but think that i have not provided the BEST home for our baby to grow in...i think about the holidays coming up and how i won't be able to participate the way i've imagined. i am however, thankful for EVERYONE that has brought over yummy meals and have gone out of their way to come and visit...thank you SO much for your love for me, scott and our little baby. i tell him everyday what a lucky and blessed duck he is...

gtt redo

candace (my favorite nurse) called with news this morning...surprise surprise - i DID NOT pass the glucose challenge screening. so not only do i have to drink the very gross drink again, i have to drink DOUBLE the amount and sit at the hospital for 3 hours...i also have to go on an empty stomach. they will also draw blood three times to check for abnormalities. this will be done on thursday...
i have my appointment with dr. pandipati tomorrow at 10:00am. i am praying for good news for at least this appointment.

eeeee...can't wait!!

scott says to at least let halloween pass us by before i get excited for CHRISTMAS...but this is my blog and i couldn't resist this picture to get me in the spirit:

* update *

i went in yesterday for my doctor's appointment. i first had to drink this really icky glucose drink that tasted like SUPER flat SUPER syrupy orange crush. you not only have to drink this but they give you a time limit (5 minutes!). i was a champ and downed it with a quickness!! then scott and i waited in the waiting area for an hour. they need the time to pass to see how my body reacts to all the sugar. i started to feel pretty sick but passed the time by playing my recent passion on the iphone: solitaire. then miguel called me back and drew my blood (he is always the one who takes my blood...i wince every time i see him...hehee). i get the results monday...

then, it was time to see dr. stewart. we started off with the routine check up stuff: urine sample, weight (i didn't gain a pound during the week where i was beached like a whale...shocking!!), measuring my belly and my favorite...listening to my baby's heartbeat! he said the little guy is a good size just by the measurment of my belly - this is good in my mind in case he decides to come early. then he checked my cervix...the same. he said it's pre-term thinning...some women truck along past their due date with a thinning cervix. others, end up having baby early. if this is the path that they think i'm on, they'll give me a steroid shot that will boost baby's lung development. so, the next step is seeing a perinatal specialist and until then, more bed rest. dr. stewart wanted a second opinion so i have an appointment on tuesday. leaving the appointment yesterday i was pretty bummed...i feel like i am not able to take care of scott, our home and especially our baby. it's been a wave of emotions but i know He is walking with me every step of this journey...

...i'm hoping for good news both monday and tuesday...

so far...

this is what we have for the baby's room so far:

{paint color: devine reef}

{bedding: all creatures great & small...from land of nod. just the quilt & bumper}

{crib: bonavita hudson classic crib}
{side table: sleigh side table...from pottery barn kids in white}* we also ordered my chair & glider from the good night room...couldn't find a picture of it but it's like a little piece of heaven. can't wait to get it.

things yet to purchase:

{dresser/changing table: hemnes dresser...from ikea}
{storage/bookcase: from the land of nod...in white. i'm not sure if the bookcase part of this will work because i've got a TON of books...my hope is that our baby boy will be a reader!}

in a previous post i also said i wanted this for the baby's room. i don't know what exactly i want for decoratives but i really liked this piece. i also want this big silver beaded mirror from ikea that i have been eying for years now...i also need to find drapes and material for a bed skirt. i also had the ambition to make a tree for the room. this task has been put on hold for now...but i do have a vision!!

little memories...

baby boy...

* i LOVE feeling you kick/punch/stretch...i wish i could see your acrobatic moves right now.
* i think it's funny when daddy tries to feel your moves & you immediately stop.
* you've given me a few scares...two prenatal non stress tests. both have told me you are a happy boy...i will try my best to give you the best little home - just stay in my belly a few more months.
* dad & i are having a HARD time to find the perfect name for you. so far, I like: matthew, jacob, max & joshua.
* your brother charlie, likes to keep you warm by wrapping himself around my belly...hope you two get along.
* you are surrounded by an AMAZING community of people that love you already. i can't wait for you to meet each & every one of them. you are one lucky duck!
* you seem to have a little party inside every time i drink juice...especially the super yummy unfiltered apple juice from the pumpkin patch this year.

see you in a few months!! love you beyond words - already.

love,
momma

bed ridden...

today is the first full day of being on bed rest. early wednesday morning at 1:15am i was woken up to sharp abdominal pains. i could barely roll over and i had to concentrate on breathing. first i thought it was gas (tee heeee!) so i went back to bed. this happened again at 2:45am...almost worse than the first time. i was in a lot of pain and i definitely was a bit alarmed but i also was super tired from the lack of sleep from the previous night. i finally fell back asleep and didn't have anymore of those "episodes." with a lot of going back and forth i finally decided to call the doctor and they wanted me to come in for another NST (fetal non-stress test). {i did this one other time because i didn't feel the little guy move around for a few days...turned out, he was just fine!} anyways, i went in and got to hear his little heartbeat again for a good 20 minutes and thought i'd be well on my way home with nothing to worry about. however, dr. stewart wanted to check a few other things and basically found out that my cervix is soft and thinner than he'd like. he also took another test to see if i'd be more susceptible for pre-term labor but thankfully that came back negative. however, for the next week i need to take this bed rest seriously because we don't want this little one to come early...i am as of today, 28 weeks.

needless to say, i am bored. dr. stewart literally wants me horizontal most of the day...my sweet husband cooked me dinner last night and rented me a few movies. i know that the Lord is teaching us something through this...we are on our knees. i was pretty much a wreck when i left the doctor's yesterday afternoon but i feel much more at peace today. i am also so thankful to have the best doctor in town...

{too bad i couldn't be here on bed rest}

i want to own this...

so i actually saw this on miss olivia's blog...and she sent me the link to the blogger who owns this piece: it's the alphabet hanging that i adore...i would love it for our baby's room. i love that it's not so baby-ish and the texture of the piece. so i read the blog and found that it came from this place in canada: bookhou. the link below is the blogger who owns this piece for her nursery...

{via http://www.ohdeedoh.com/ohdeedoh/my-room/my-room-sagetoronto-ca-128406}

when i was up in seattle buying the bedding...i came across this piece that i also loved:

{land of nod}

but again, i love the alphabet wood piece from above a bit more only because it can grow with our baby...thoughts are welcome.

the big gender reveal!!

okay so i'm going out of order but better to get this all down so i can remember...we had our 20 week ultrasound august 30, 2010 at 10:00am. our perinatal nurse suzanna was so wonderful - she was awesome!! anyways, we heard our little baby's hearbeat, saw the little feet and hands and then she had us close our eyes when it was time to check the gender parts. we told her our plan and she was just as excited as we were! she placed the ultrasound picture in an envelope and sealed it...and we were off to enjoy the rest of the day!

scott and i went to lunch together and then headed off to baby gap. scott was in charge of picking out the little girl's outfit and i was in charge of the little boy's outfit's. it was fun to watch scott pick out little girl's outfit's. the super cute ladies at baby gap were also just as excited and other managers kept coming to join in on our fun. we handed them the sealed envelope {and our credit card} and told them that they would be the second people that knew what we were having. their mission {as soon as we left the store} was to open the envelope and wrap up the gender specific outfits for us and include the ultrasound picture in it. scott and i stepped outside and waited anxiously on the little bench. i was so excited i could hardly stand it!! finally, susie {one of the ladies} came out with the wrapped box with a huge smile. she wished us a great time tonight..and we were off!

dinner wasn't until 6:30pm so i desperately needed to find something to occupy my time. we went to the store to pick up the paint for the baby's room {regardless whether we were having a girl or boy we had the color picked out} and then we went home to pack for our hawaii trip the next day. it was FINALLY time to head over to scott's parents house...

it was sort of crazy at mom and dad wang's...we were trying to get mark on speaker phone and googoo {scott's aunt} too. we FINALLY got everyone connected and we were ready to open the box! everyone stood around us and at the first peak under the tissue paper...i saw that we were having a little BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! charlie was going to have a little brother...poor thing had no idea what was going on with all the cheers of excitement...after that it was a stream of texts and phone calls to our family and friends. needless to say, scott and i are happy beyond words. this was a forever-remember day...we are having a son!!

{20 weeks & 4 days: august 30, 2010}

{cousin jessica & justin: trying to get mark on speaker!}

{the chaos trying to get everyone in the same room & on the phone}

{the outfits we picked our for our baby BOY!!}

{i LOVE this picture. grandma's & aunt looking at the ultrasound picture that shows he is indeed a boy!!}

{baby = 1/2 of scott. 1/2 of me. so insane}

{a picture with the proud grandparents to be...minus my dad}

maui 2010

i can finally say: I'VE BEEN TO HAWAII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what an amazing and beautiful place! i have to state that out of all the things i could possibly say about maui's beauty...i'll remember this the most: EVERYONE is so friendly and i LOVE that!! if you know me at all, being GENUINELY kind is one of my favorite traits in anybody. and it's sad because i find this quality rare in strangers especially - but man, maui gets two thumbs up...here are some pics of our "babymoon." {i don't really quite understand why they call it this}

{i asked scott if i would get a lei when we got off the plane...he smiled and said "no...that's just in the movies." but guess what?! when we got to our hotel, they lei'd me!!}

{the first viewpoint we stopped at on the way to lahaina}

{a beach near lahaina...forgot what it was called. dang that one piece of hair...}

{our hotel lobby-ish area}
{we found this ice cream shop...lappert's hawaii. YUM}

{we had to chase the sun this day...found a little private beach along the highway} {these next sequence of pictures makes me smile...i picture our little boy doing the exact same thing (with dad again of course). scott was trying to outsmart a sand crab...the last picture you'll see is the look of defeat}

{my alcohol free pina colada}

{watching scott boogie board while i, bathed in the sun}

{our last night in maui...the sunset was GORGEOUS}

{one of the best meals...nick's fish market, maui ~ the fairmont 2010}